Being in the present, right here, is a gift or maybe an ability. I don't do well staying with the now and what is in front of me. Futurizing what could be gets me into trouble. I have hurt people I love because I futurized an outcome and based on my future story canceled my plans. At best, I have deceived myself into thinking I was preparing for unseen events. At the worst, I see that I have worried the future into what is here.
On a recent trip I wanted to stay more mindful of what was. Letting go of what could happen allowed me to see my family and friends more clearly.
My brother performing in front of his vocology students took my breath away. His students were fabulous and so open with their emotions.
Ivan Nielson invited us into his home to share his affection for my aunt. He brought out a cookie jar which sat in her kitchen. I don't remember cookies in the jar but I remember her trying the American custom of having a jar ready for kids.
Distant cousins showed up at a family reunion and I became acquainted with men who were boys once and tormented me. In the here and now they turned out to be kind, loving fathers and husbands.
And here today, I have two granddaughters staying with me. I should close this post before they wake up. They will want to see my eyes on them, here, now.