Enjoy- What Makes A Day Enjoyable

"It was my interest in happiness that led me to the subject of habits, and of course, the study of habits is really the study of happiness. Habits are the invisible architecture of everyday life, and a significant element of happiness. "

Gretchen Rubin

     After many weeks of pondering what made me happy I  decided years ago that there are six habits that add to my happiness. An enjoyable day is one where all or most of these habits have taken place. Conversely, a bad day usually means I did not practice enough of these six habits and I am feeling a lack. 

1. Prayer
2. Gospel Study
3. Movement
4. Nourishing Eating
5. Creative pursuits
6. Service

These habits invite me to face inward and outward. They balance my need to be contemplative and other oriented. They nourish my soul and help me see others needs, as well as my own. 

  All six of these habits require daily intention. Maybe that means they are not habitual yet. If left to my slovenly ways I would do none of them. That would require little effort but make my least enjoyable day. Why do we resist the very practices that make us happiest? I think it is the nature of mortality. 

 I have been writing with the Five Minute Friday Group for two years and I really enjoy the talented writers who share their work. Would you like to join? 

Saturday Synopsis

    This week I practiced my habits of happiness with full involvement. There are many weeks that go by when I just cannot get one habit into gear. Moving through yoga stretches has been wonderful this week. I wonder why I resist doing the very things that make my life easier? I am back to using my Lose  It! App and it does make me more responsible to nourish my body effectively.

     Serving in my women's organization gives me many opportunities to meet new people and make new connections. I'm learning that serving has many faces. Sometimes it takes doing physical work to help someone else cope with a difficult situation and often it is being available to listen to the concerns of a valued friend. My study habit has a strong focus as I am teaching in church tomorrow. I do love teaching but still go through hot and cold feelings as I consider what will be appropriate and how capable I am to deliver the message through the Holy Ghost. I do have to rely on prayer to magnify my study effectiveness.

   And, creating is still a major draw. This week I used a puzzle box as inspiration to try my hand at watercoloring. I feel pleased with my efforts and will try to do more.

   My goals are carrying over from season to season. I can, with confidence, revise my opinion that I am unable to finish anything.  Enough about me, what is good with you?

My Five Senses

      I feel inspired to write about my appreciation for my five senses. I cannot begin to give justice to the amazing blessing these physical senses provide. My thoughts turned here when I was reading Susan Branch's book "A Fine Romance". Her ability to write brought me to England to see, hear, touch smell, and taste the countywide.

    The artist's eye sees differently. Light is differentiated from dark by tiny degrees. Lines are interspersed between open spaces. Colors come through the eyes and change feelings and attitudes.

   My eyes look wider now. I stop for visual drama and try to feel the display that nature provides. What I see can heal me from inward preoccupation.

My hearing is challenged by the music I listen to and play on the piano. Just lately I've been listening to the voices in Variation No.22 of Bach's Goldberg Suite. I am touched by the reverence in the harmony notes as they carry the melody to a new sacred place.

Touching natural plants, rocks, and shells made my hands feel like they can play the piano keys with more gentleness.

     There is such variety of textures in nature. The smooth things are examples of living under pressure and change. They once started rough and jagged. But water, light and wind have worked on them to change their very essence. I take solace in that process.

I learned a lot from my little friend Marlee. She touched everything in and out of the water. With inquisitive hands she processed the new and old.

    Not to forget smell. I have renewed my love of essential oils. There are some oils that smell of healing. They were given to me shortly after hospital visits. Their aroma are just as etched in my mind and any picture or word.

 
    I have not forgotten taste. I struggle with becoming more refined in my tastes. I wish I could learn to eat more slowly. I shall do more to heighten that sense. This physical body is such a blessing.

More July Joy

        July, for me, is a month to ponder and write about joy. There are many reasons to feel joy. What I write are just ideas that stir inside and seem to ring true. Joy may come from understanding. When knowledge becomes wisdom sometimes a sweet understanding begins deep within the heart. It most certainly comes from the Holy Ghost.  I call that joy. It softens, calms, and brings a solace that is like nourishment to a hungry soul. Notice how these scriptures, divided into categories of reasons for joy, all seem to be about coming to an eternal understanding.

            Joy at the promise with being with Heavenly Father

Psalms 16:11 Thou wilt shew me the path of life: in thy presence is fulness of joy; at thy right hand there are pleasures for evermore.

             Joy at Repentance

Psalms 51:6 Behold, thou desirest truth in the inward parts: and in the hidden part thou shalt make me to know wisdom. Purge me with hyssop, and I shall be clean: wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow. Make me to hear joy and gladness; that the bones which thou hast broken may rejoice. Hide thy face from my sins, and blot out all mine iniquities. Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me.

Isaiah 51:3 For the Lord shall comfort Zion: he will comfort all her waste places; and he will make her wilderness like Eden, and her desert like the garden of the Lord; joy and gladness shall be found therein, thanksgiving, and the voice of melody.

Jeremiah 33:11 The voice of joy, and the voice of gladness, the voice of the bridegroom, and the voice of the bride, the voice of them that shall say, Praise the Lord of hosts: for the Lord is good; for his mercy endureth for ever: and of them that shall bring the sacrifice of praise into the house of the Lord. For I will cause to return the captivity of the land, as at the first, saith the Lord.

         Joy at Drawing on the Atonement

Isaiah 12:2 Behold, God is my salvation; I will trust, and not be afraid: for the Lord JEHOVAH is my strength and my song; he also is become my salvation.  Therefore with joy shall ye draw water out of the wells of salvation.

Isaiah 61:3 To appoint unto them that mourn in Zion, to give unto them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they might be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the Lord, that he might be glorified.

Doctrine and Covenants 128:19 Now, what do we hear in the gospel which we have received? A voice of gladness! A voice of mercy from heaven; and a voice of truth out of the earth; glad tidings for the dead; a voice of gladness for the living and the dead; glad tidings of great joy. How beautiful upon the mountains are the feet of those that bring glad tidings of good things, and that say unto Zion: Behold, thy God reigneth! As the dews of Carmel, so shall the knowledge of God descend upon them!

Doctrine and Covenants 128:23 Let the mountains shout for joy, and all ye valleys cry aloud; and all ye seas and dry lands tell the wonders of your Eternal King! And ye rivers, and brooks, and rills, flow down with gladness. Let the woods and all the trees of the field praise the Lord; and ye solid rocks weep for joy! And let the sun, moon, and the morning stars sing together, and let all the sons of God shout for joy! And let the eternal creations declare his name forever and ever! And again I say, how glorious is the voice we hear from heaven, proclaiming in our ears, glory, and salvation, and honor, and immortality, and eternal life; kingdoms, principalities, and powers!

                  Joy From testifying

Jeremiah 15:16 Thy words were found, and I did eat them; and thy word was unto me the joy and rejoicing of mine heart: for I am called by thy name, O Lord God of hosts.

                 Joy at knowing Jesus has come

Luke 1:14 And thou shalt have joy and gladness; and many shall rejoice at his birth.

     I do believe receiving joy may come from being ready and open. The voices giving words to the above scriptures were seeking, knocking and expecting answers. Joy may be the outcome of a believer's desire. 

July Is For Joy

         Have you ever laughingly thought that Lehi must have excluded women in the following scripture because he knew they worried too much to have real joy?

   2 Nephi 2:25 "Adam fell that men might be; and men are, that they might have joy."

         Joke aside, women may be even more able to embrace joy. In the past I sometimes tried to save joy for later when my current worry was resolved. I have recently learned that joy can't be saved in a "good feelings" bank account. When it comes the road opens and a fork appears. This way, let the feeling flood me, engulf me, and witness the gift like water from a deep well. The other way, block it, deny it, and hope it is there when you feel more worthy.

     What is Lehi saying right before this message about joy? 

     2 Nephi 2:21 "And the days of the children of men were prolonged, according to the will of God, that they might repent while in the flesh;"

     What does repentance have to do with joy? There is nothing that brings the Holy Ghost faster than repentance. When a child of God chooses to act and desires repentance, swoosh....divine help appears. There is an opportunity to feel the amazing love of God in the repentance process. I observed that when my son invited his girl friend to take the missionary lessons in our home. Each week the joy quotient rose in our family. I felt electrified, uplifted, and full of joy as she steadily came to the choice to be baptized.

     Now, what does Lehi say after the scripture about joy?

    2 Nephi 2:26 "And the Messiah cometh in the fulness of time, that he may redeem the children of men from the fall. And because that they are redeemed from the fall they have become free forever, knowing good from evil; to act for themselves and not to be acted upon, save it be by the punishment of the law at the great and last day, according to the commandments which God hath given."

  There is no other way to have a fullness of joy. It is rooted, planted, and firmly embedded in our Savior Jesus Christ. He is the good news. His testifies of joy himself.

  3 Nephi 17:20 "And they arose from the earth, and he said unto them: Blessed are ye because of your faith. And now behold, my joy is full."

   I think His joy was full because these souls were choosing Him. They wanted alignment with his mission to bring them back to Heavenly Father. They were choosing at-one-ment. 

Truly the fullness of joy will come when we are in the presence of our Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ again. Nevertheless, I have benefited from some small down payments that the Father has given me. These feelings are deep within my heart. Often I am compelled to tell whoever is close by that I am so happy. I can't seem to engineer these feelings so I know they are from a divine source. They don't seem to be connected to lack of adversity. In the middle of a trying, difficult scenario, I have been sent this joy. It is however my choice to receive. Just like a football player reaching, stretching, and running toward the ball, I find that the joy is cherished so much more when I am willing to receive. May we spend some time this July thinking on the choices we make that help us receive joy.

Revisiting My Six Habits Of Happiness

       After many weeks of pondering what makes me happy I  decided that there are six habits that add to my happiness.

1. Prayer
2. Gospel Study
3. Movement
4. Nourishing Eating
5. Creative pursuits
6. Service

  I have written about these habits each individually and collectively so I just wanted to report on their relevance in my life just lately. I have learned that it is hard to do these things a certain amount everyday. Lately I've spent many days in service to my family. When my time is tight I sometimes abandon nourishing eating or gospel study. Other times my creative pursuits are so compelling that I hide away in my studio. It seems that the glue that holds all six habits together is prayer.

Gretchen Rubin who wrote Happier At Home is currently writing a book about habits. I found her loopholes applicable in my life.

Loopholes to allow us to halt or break a desired habit.

1- False Choice- I can't do this because I'm busy doing….

2-Moral Licensing- I'm allowed because I've been good

3-Tomorrow it will be better

4-Lack of control over the situation- I couldn't do it because....

5-Apparently irrelevant decision - I was on my way to the gym when I remembered….

6-This doesn't count- I'm on vacation or I'm sick today

7-Questionable assumption-I have an appointment in two hours so it doesn't seem like I have time for….

8-Concern for others- this will bother so and so

9. Fake Self-Acculization -you only live once, go ahead and splurge

10. The One Coin Loophole- missing one day of study won't make a difference.

  I'm currently working on my movement habit. I figured out that since the gym is on the way home from taking my husband to work the best time to work out is then. I like problem solving like this. Why am I skipping the activities that make me happy? How can I make it happen daily? 

Progress

     Clara listened intently to her friend's voice searching for signs that their commitment to meeting together every week was just too much.
   "I'm okay either way. You are so very busy and we can certainly skip our study together this time."
    Disappointment washed through Clara. Even though she was tired and empty she wanted to hear that getting together was essential to Sophie's happiness. But, perhaps it was not. After all, meeting once a week to study was far and beyond what she had ever asked from a friend. Yet, they had managed more than a year of weekly appointments. Some weeks Clara studied the material early on but other times cramming at 6:00am was the only option. By now three notebooks were filled with inspiring quotes and thoughtful ideas.
   "Alright, I suppose it is wise for me to take some time to rest before I go to work." Clara felt her heart drop. What did she really need? What was Sophie hinting at? The grade school mentality rose and she entertained the idea that she was not all that important to her friend. A imaginary road opened up before her eyes. There was a fork in the road. She had an opportunity to make a choice. She could pull in and feel rejected which would lead to a small wound the next time they got together, or, she could drive over to her friend's house and speak the truth.
   Clara knocked and waited. As Sophie turned the corner from the kitchen into the hallway she smiled.
   "I need you more than I need a nap or down time," Clara laughed sheepishly. "Can we talk?"

   As we hustle for worthiness in this mixed up world, one thing I'm learning is that I am worthy of love and belonging and when I approach you from that place of worthiness, you become worthy of the same.

Finding Meaning

               I attended a religious ceremony yesterday with strangers. We were a small company of ten. A man I have often observed in previous ceremonies, who came in a wheel chair, caught my attention. Towards the end. we stood in a circle, facing each other. This man with physical limitations beyond my  ability to grasp, was making eye contact with each of us.

      His gaze was intense. I almost drowned in the love and tenderness emanating from his face. i wanted to look away, but I smiled back. Something very special had happened inside this man.

            I had come to the temple with a prayer that I would learn something of how to be with people. My prayer was answered in the eyes of a man limited in every way, physically, but soaring spiritually.

On Again Off Again

    Last year at this time I was feeling fairly powerful because I was still losing weight. Then the fall and winter months crept in and the pounds started to come back, one by one. By February in post surgery mode I stopped logging calories and that was a big mistake. I am not back to my starting weight but I feel the difference in the way my clothes fit. I am grateful for this body. I do not always honor it, or remember my royal past and future, but I am aware.

   Aware that I can perceive and understand all things better when my body is nourished and it has moved appropriately, circulating enough blood and energy. I am in the best possible place right now for  regaining my balance between weight loss and moderate calorie intake. I have an exercise buddy at the gym and my trusty i-phone app to keep me honest. (I have been known to lie to the app)

Find Joy In The Everyday

   "Gratitude is the way home and joy lives there."
     The everyday habits we have seem mundane but those are the very things we miss when adversity comes. Losing normal brings us to our knees. So the everyday normal things we do have a place of honor. I feel gratitude for my morning routine.

   I quietly tiptoe upstairs to my studio/office and turn on the heater. The twinkle lights around the room go on and I go back downstairs to make my morning sludge. One scoop of protein, one scoop of powdered greens, and a tablespoon of fish oil with water makes a shake which is, in truth, barely tolerable. Then back up the dark stairs to place myself on the mat. I move my joints and breathe and cox the stiffness out.

   My desk holds many things to play with. I can paint, draw, write, or read. The best days are when I do them all. This morning was such a day. I am so grateful for my personal space and morning ritual.

The Word Bubble

     If a computer could look through all the words appearing on my recent blog site, what words would appear the most often? It makes me happy that the top words are the very ideas I want to communicate.

                                                  Make your own word bubble here.

New Ways Of Moving

    My husband, being thin by heredity, has never promoted exercising together. I was shocked when he suggested that we try swimming together as a way of keeping fit. How could I object to something I really enjoy? So, we joined the Athletic Club and believe it or not, we are swimming three times a week.

    We technically have only been swimming together a few times because I like to go in the morning and he is limited to going in the evening. I go through all kinds of mental gyrations to get there; the pool may be too full, I look terrible in a swimming suit, I don't swim correctly,…. mostly thoughts I had when I was 14. But once I am in the water, I love it. My husband is so fun to watch as he tries out his "gear". He did not consult me when he bought everything in matching yellow. Yes, that is a snorkel.

   I still fully stand behind my six habits of happiness; pray, study, nourish, create, move, and serve. That doesn't mean they are easy to participate in every day. They do, however make me happy, when I'm done.

Vicarious Farming

   There are mini cultures in which I wish membership but, alas I am a fraud. One of those is the world of sustainable farming. This year I did not even try to plant. I can't say I have ever been really successful at planting a garden but being a vicarious gardener is the best ever. My CSA subscription caught my fancy and I love receiving the bag or box every Thursday.

    I invited "my farmers" over for dinner to thank them for their hard work and diligence. We ate vegetables from their garden and lamb from a local dairy. I quizzed them about their passion for the soil and their answers did not disappoint. They farm because they love the connection to the earth. It makes them happy to labor on the land.

       Having worked on sustainable farms as interns, this year was the first go on their own. Their main concern was finding the right irrigation system and finding balance of just enough water. I feel genuinely grateful that young farmers care to learn and work so hard.

On The Mat

   In the summer it is a treat to do yoga outside. Timing the right hour is important because behind my house there is privacy but also direct sun. It can get hot.

      Between 7-8am is perfect. I put down a piece of plywood, rollout my mat, and stack my props.
When I find a tall, stable seat, I sit. I listen. I feel, I close my eyes but see with my inner eyes how my body is doing.

   My shadow records the first balance of the day. As we get older our ears lose some of the ability to stay balanced. An average 20 year old can close their eyes and balance on one foot for up to 30 seconds. I can make it to 5 seconds before I fall out. With eyes open I do much better but each day is different. Just like life, some days are more balanced than others. The reason I searched for the six habits of happiness in my life was to maintain balance.Yoga provides my body the habit of moving.

   Warrior one is a powerful pose. The back leg stretches back, the forward leg bends and provides the counter-balance to the back leg. The arms are in opposition to each other reaching strongly.
Just like my habit of moving is in opposition to my habit of creating. One is physical; the other mental, but both balance each other.

    Do I fulfill all six habits everyday. Well…most days I do and those are the best days.

Pencil And Paper

   I have taken pencils and paper lately, not to write words, but to record images. I draw now and then and this is now. Drawing is to seeing what music is to hearing. Artists use a way of seeing that is not perceptual. They don't draw what they know is a "hand", they draw the lines and curves and the negative space around the "hand". Magically, that then becomes a hand. I copy what I see and start the drawing with the picture upside down. This keeps my brain from interfering with instructions on what to draw. Since the model is on it's head I am left to look at shapes and relationships.

     When I draw from real life I find it is difficult to talk people into standing on their heads while I draw them. I am limited and not "really good". But that is okay. My father was an artist and we sometimes made fun of his drawings, noting his mistakes. Now I look at his renderings differently. I ponder his subjects, his perspective, and his emotions just under the surface of the sketch. It tells his story and I like remembering him.

Six Habits of Happiness- Study No. 2

   This summer along with reading the Book of Mormon, I have embarked on another study project. Along with a study buddy, I have been reading two General Conferences talks a week and writing down my impressions. Lesa, at Everyday Notes, is featuring my project on her blog today. Go take a look, please?

Creating With Food

I purchased my first food processor. What? This late in the game? Hey, hold it, I still don't own a dishwasher and haven't for the last 25 years. My dish washers moved out, mostly, and so I do dishwashing in Zen mode. More on that subject, here.

Since I have fabulous farmers working for me, CSA, and a food storage with waiting staples, I am creating with food.

Here is roasted red pepper hummus and pistachio basil pesto.

   Did I mention the fabulous farmers working for me? The first broccoli was tender and so light in flavor. Picked and on the table the same day!

   This book is revamping my cooking. it has introduced me to FASS. This stands for Fat, Acid, Salt Sweet and this check can so improve any dish. Is your dish missing something? Try adding a drizzle of olive oil, (fat), a suss of lemon juice, (acid), a dash of salt, and lastly, Grade B maple syrup,( the sweet.)

My farmers added flowers to their salad mix this week. I look forward to Thursdays to see what will be in my bag.

                                                           Bon Appetit!

I Can See What You Value

I was looking at a home in Australia online admiring their large kitchen table when the floor to ceiling bookcases caught my eye. The thought came past my mind that I could see what this family valued. Ironically my eyes lifted to the view in my own kitchen. I saw what we valued, as well.

    In every room we have floor to ceiling bookcases to house the hundreds of books we love and read.

 
        Is it time to purge? Which decade should be the first to get pruned? I remember my friend Fran, who passed away from breast cancer, who had a library to meet any need. I would visit and lose myself in her volumes of history, religion, and humor. She couldn't thin her thick tomes and I so understand.

Community Supported Agriculture

My daughter, The Knitting Queen, put down a nice lump of change to buy into a CSA, Community Supported Agriculture, subscription this summer. When she asked me to pay half I started doing math to see if this was a good deal. I received a rather stern lecture about the importance of supporting local farming. Yes, I had to agree that the produce was superior to anything trucked into our community. It tasted velvety and firm at the same time. Yes, I had to agree that having local farmers was a smart move in a unstable economic time. Yes, I had to agree that knowing how my vegetables were grown and who was doing the hard work was comforting. And yes, I wanted to support the young and energetic farmers who have committed to learning and understanding how to responsibly till the earth.

With that lecture internalized I received the first "bag of vegetables" from Stitchdown Farm.

    The Kale was superb and almost convinced my husband, who hates Kale, to eat a bit more. He prefers the taste of spinach. To my surprise a goose egg lay hiding in the delivery. Wow! That will make a nice omelet.

    The salad mix was so fresh and flavorful. I am convinced that these two farmers will add to the joy of this summer. If you are not growing your own vegetables this year or would like to augment what you have in your garden, contact Stitchdown Farm@gmail.com

 
                                     PS, Don't you just hate getting lectures from your kids?

Teaching As Service

   I teach all day long. My weekday starts at 6:30am when My Early Morning Guests come and continues most mornings with before school piano lessons. Then back on the piano bench at 2:00pm until 6:30pm. It is my job but many days it is also a service to fill the need of a young person at just the right moment. Often the lesson learned goes far beyond the music bench.

    Maria was playing a difficult piece with all the right notes but she seemed unaware of the rhythm pulse. On which part of the beat did the notes enter? Her brow furrowed and her body tensed. I asked her to isolate two measures and write in the beats. A moment of fear passed her eyes. What exactly did I mean? We started at the beginning. How many counts did the quarter note get? 1 & 2 &, she squeezed the symbols under the staff and waited as the next note appeared to be tied to a following note. Where did that tied note fit in the beats? We seemed to be as far away from the flow and beauty of this song as possible. In frustration she looked at me, silently asking how this could possibly clear up her practice problem.

  The ear and the senses are remarkable tools in playing the piano but they are sometimes 

wrong. Often we must go back to the linear math of music to see how the notes are put together. Ideally that should happen the first time we read a new piece but we get seduced by the sound and get carried away, guessing instead of knowing what the notes reveal.

  Life is like that to. Quite often we do not take stock of what is happening. We "play it by ear" and find out later we are fuzzy on the details. Our experience feels out of sync and no longer holds the joy we thought possible. That is when we must go back to the beginning and count. What action should I have taken at this point in the experience. How is the moment tied to this action? As the linear processing unfolds we begin to feel the steady beat, and now we know when we are right. There is nothing as physically satisfying as being "right on the beat".