Monday, August 1, 2016

Mindful Monday- Married For Forty-Two Years

                                         Do you know everything about your spouse?

   Being mindful means paying close attention. Is there a better relationship to be mindful in than my marriage? No!

                             Mindfulness offers us the space for greater discernment.

  As the years go by it is easy to define our relationship in a certain way. I like this and he likes that. We do this together and this apart. We agree here and disagree there. Our mindset can become fixed which closes the space available in a living relationship. Mindfulness opens up new ways of seeing each other.
   Last week during a shopping trip, my husband and I ended up at a mattress store. I was surprised by his willingness to try out new mattresses. I payed attention to his playfulness as we pretended to be awed by each more expensive style. To my utter surprise he told me to go ahead and do the paper work for the one we both loved. And, then, he promptly took a nap. We have a new mattress, which is wonderful, but I believe that decision came about because I was being mindful of him and watching his responses instead of steering the activities with a fixed outcome. I did not go into the store with a plan and I did not push for an outcome. I merely observed the activity.
   
This month my mindfulness practice will center on him, the man I married forty-two years ago.


     
          



             You can read more about my Year of Mindfulness here.

4 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. Thanks, Shari. The days are long but the years are short.

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  2. Congratulations on 42 years of marriage! I like your insights here. I think it's true in a lot of relationships that we can have fixed ideas of what a person will do in a situation or how they will respond and it would make a big difference just to observe and be mindful.

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    Replies
    1. Thank-you, Carly. Observing is such an important process.

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