A Visual Of The Cycle Of Change

Our change may not be linear, but a cycle, that we can loop around and begin again.

Much is written about making change and starting good habits. I picked up on a classic theory on motivation by Prochaska and Declemente who describe change as a cycle.

This was a new theory in the late seventies and is now very much excepted.

"They thought it all starts with pre-contemplation, where we aren't even thinking about making a change, then progresses through contemplation - where we become aware of something being problematic but don't do anything differently, to preparation for a change, then finally taking action, and then maybe hardest of all trying to maintain that change. It's really hard to stick to a change in behaviour so often we relapse back into our old way of being, but we might cycle through those initial stages much quicker the next time round."

"I like the way they describe this as a cycle, which means we don’t have to beat ourselves up if we do fall off the wagon, but instead just climb back on. I also like the way they include a phase where we might not even be consciously aware of the need to change. Sometimes looking back at decisions I’ve made to change something I can think of a reason why, but it’s not always totally clear at the time."

This theory supports my One Little Word this year. Umkekr means to cycle around and do it better.

"She went back to all that was comfortable and familiar while keeping her gaze looking ahead- to all that would be and could."

Colleen Attara

Click here to see a table of contents of how this word has become a focus in my life this year.

 

Playing With My Word To Make It Visual

Creativity brings an abstract concept into focus and provides a sensory memory of playing with meaning.

This month I am looking around my home and observing all the ways I've used my One Little Word for 2018 in a visual way. 

At the beginning of the year I like to do a painting with the word attached. This year I choose I scene with a cat, looking out over the water. The cat is me thinking back at what has happened in my life and how to be I can be a little better, kinder, more aware. 

UMKEHR 

Have you ever been lost on a road and realized that you are not where you intended to be? That is when the desire to Umkehr comes on strong. Start again, from the beginning and this time choose a different path.

Each time I take the little plastic word and place it in a different setting I take time to reflect on why I love this word and this principle. It is a principle because it requires action, not just a static concept.

"She went back to all that was comfortable and familiar while keeping her gaze looking ahead- to all that would be and could."

Colleen Attara

Click here to see a table of contents of how this word has become a focus in my life this year.

 

Kein Umkehr- No Re-Entry

Failure is the only opportunity to begin again, only this time more wisely.

Henry Ford

I was struck by the symbol on the airport sign indicating that you cannot pass this way again if you turn around and leave.

There are pathways you can not re-enter once you leave but there are many that allow for a turn around.

My One Little Word for 2018 is Umkehr and it is a word that allows for great hope.

    Six months into 2017 I was worried that I would get tired of the word 'nurture'. I don't have those same concerns this year simple because I don't need to invent new goals or come up with a new plan, I need only to return to those goals that have worked before. 

What am I most excited about as I go into the next six months?
  *Return to my writing everyday
  *Return to healing mode as I do surgery on the second knee.
  *Return to planning group lessons for piano students in the Fall
  *Return to my weight loss program after surgery
  *Return to the art room and create something new
  *Return to visiting grandkids with my new car. Yay! I don't have to worry about the car dying on me.

"She went back to all that was comfortable and familiar while keeping her gaze looking ahead- to all that would be and could."

Colleen Attara

Click here to see a table of contents of how this word has become a focus in my life this year.

 

Questions About My Word Umkehr

     With pride, there are many curses. With humility, there come many blessings. 

Ezra Taft Benson

June is a month to evaluate the relationship I have with my One Little Word 2018.

Umkekr
to change one's ways

Having a word like Umkehr has meant that I seriously watch where my actions are taking me. It is a word that invites reflection and evaluation. Seeing the word and responding willingly to the word has made space for humility.

I have enjoyed that this word is hopeful. 

If we can turn and right our path then we can correct our mistakes and begin again. Just like I come back to the Bach Sonata on the piano each day and with hope work through the mistakes I made the day before, so I look at the mistakes I make with my impatience with my husband. I must correct my actions so often with him when I push to have my own way. "I'm sorry" are words that coexist with Umkehr.

The challenges I face with my little word is overcoming pride. 

I'll not change my ways to suit you. These are my mistakes and I own them proudly. I can't possibly let anyone see how often I fall back to self-defeating behavior so I'll pretend that I don't care.

I can tell that I'm entangled with pride when I run the same script in my head rationalizing my behavior. When I can't concentrate on the question, "What do others need from me?" then I'm pretty sure I need a good dose of Umkehr.

Pride and humility, one stops us from righting our path and the other makes our path open with hope.

"She went back to all that was comfortable, familiar, and right, while keeping her gaze looking ahead- to all that would be and could."

Colleen Attara

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Click here to see a table of contents of how this word has become a focus in my life this year.

 

Halfway Through Check In

                                 In Progress

This month I will ask mid year evaluation questions

A Mid-Year Check In To See How Things Are Going And Reconnect

     In one or two words, your OLW experience so far has been:

Pushy, Direct

              What has surprised you most so far this year?

  In a world that values novelty and brand new things it surprised me that returning to what I previously attempted has been the most productive.

  For example; the creative pursuits I had in high school and college are now taking up new space in my life. Art and writing were very attractive to me forty years ago and I waddled into those experiences with a huge "I'm not good enough" cloud over my head. I put them away telling myself that raising children was the priority now. Truthfully, I put them away because I didn't receive the validation from others I thought I needed.

  It is different now. Being better at painting or writing than others is just not important anymore. I don't have another forty years to wait to prove myself. What I have now is enough.

"She went back to all that was comfortable and familiar while keeping her gaze looking ahead- to all that would be and could."

Colleen Attara

              What are you most proud of related to your word?

I am most proud of the fact that I have been inspired by this little word to come back, return to what is wholesome and nurturing. Seeing my word in many places around my house has kept my wandering heart open and willing.

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Click here to see a table of contents of how this word has become a focus in my life this year.

A Picture From the Past (Umkehr)

Some memories are unforgettable, remaining ever vivid and heartwarming! 

Joseph B. Wirthlin

I love returning (Umkehr) to old pictures and being drawn to fashions from the past. Let's take the apron, as an example. Wearing an apron was common place in the 1950's. My mother used a wringer washer and we hung our clothes out on the clothesline. The next day we ironed the stiff dried clothing. It took two full days to get the weekly wash done.

Consequently wearing outfits more than once was essential. 

   Bring on the apron. Covering your blouse or dress with a pretty apron cut down on the ever growing laundry. I purchased a hand made, seer-sucker apron from Portland Apron Company to match the ones my aunt used to sew and I love it. It takes me back to times long gone. I loved spending my summers at the farm where my aunt and uncle raised goats and chickens. She always did her work with an apron over her clothing. She hid a treat or two in the deep pockets of her apron for the many children who loved her. I loved her smell, essence of goat and peppermint. She was round and squishy to hug, and she did love to give hugs. The picture above, shows her holding, not one, but two babies. With no children of her own all babies and children, in general, were cherished and valued. She modeled that love to me every time I was with her and I believe I am affectionate with children because of what she showed me.

   My One Little Word Umkehr inspires me to return often to pictures and memories of the past. A memory can bring umkehr and focus your decisions and aspirations.

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Click here to see a table of contents of how this word has become a focus in my life this year.

Returning To My Ancestors In Pictures

   To understand and reconnect with our stories, the stories of the ancestors, is to build our identities. 

Frank Delaney

Pictures that communicate my word or help me connect to my word are often pictures of my parents and beloved ancestors. To make a return to them, or to the ways they supported me, is very reassuring. 

I recently made a book about my mother's life. She left a personal history and I reproduced that along with pictures and commentary from me, about my recollections. When my children and grandchildren get caught up in the fast paced menagerie called "life" I want them to seek out the example and advice from ancestors who made tough decisions and opened paths for us to progress and reach our potential.

  I have a grandson who loved the book about his great-grandmother. When I see his picture holding the book I feel the word Umkehr resonating clearly. 

Return to the past 

to find your future

Remember what was 

sacrificed for you

by those who wanted 

better and found

the best.


Click here to see how I use my One Little Word Umker
differently every month.

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My novel Rubato

A story of a woman's longing for beauty and her struggle to keep the beautiful even when it didn't belong to her.

Click here to read the book for free for a limited time.

Using My One Little Word On Pictures

"One of the things that continues to stand out for me as I do this prompt is the reminder that photos are such an excellent way to give thanks for life."

Ali Edwards

For many years now I have painted a picture which then carries my word for the year. These paintings vary in size and have a place in my house. 

   They hold experiences that I've tried to capture on canvas. As I look around I notice that I am most affected by the sun rising, I am so grateful to have a place close to my home on the water where I can see the complete rising. Every time I am there I feel more mindful of God, nurtured by his artwork, and ready to turn back to Him. These paintings hold space for that live experience when I can't go.  

Truly these words have infiltrated my thoughts and actions. 

          They are like chapter headings to my life.

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My novel Rubato

A story of a woman's longing for beauty and her struggle to keep the beautiful even when it doesn't belong to her.

Click here to read the book for free for a limited time.

Umkehr in Pictures

We keep moving forward, opening new doors, and doing new things, because we're curious and curiosity keeps leading us down new paths.

 Walt Disney

Below is a recent picture posted on my daughter's account. She is teaching me to knit. I'm looking pretty pleased with myself. 

   Eight hours later I get my first reality check. "Why can't you tell the difference between knit and purl? And, what are all these yarn overs?" 

   I could have been offended and then tempted to quit but I'm far enough down this road to grit my teeth and say, "Shall I turn around? Shall I umkehr?"

   The road back has little short cuts that bring you back on track but don't necessarily make you go all the way to the beginning. 

I'm seeing more and understanding better. That is the joy of Umkehr.

More About The Word Umkehr

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My novel Rubato

A riveting murder mystery about a morally compromised woman’s resolve to protect her musical discovery. 

Click here to read the book for free for a limited time.

What If I Get Off Track Again?

               What If I Get Off Track Again?

    Many weeks ago I wrote a post about my meditation practice. I marveled that after ninety-seven days in a row I suddenly forgot to do meditation one morning. I did feel deflated and my readers reminded me that ninety-seven days was amazing. What happens to our attitude when we stop and start habits? 

  Maybe you are an all or nothing person. You establish a really good habit and prepare yourself to add it to your daily life. Then, the phone rings and someone needs help immediately, or you get sick, or a friend calls to whisk you away on an exciting adventure. There goes your habit. Do you quit? Is meditating for ninety-seven days in a row and missing the next day a disaster? No, you say. Get real! Things happen. 

   But, the truth is I use getting off track as an excuse to quit my new habit. Yes, I do. Here's what I say to myself. It's not practical. Or, I'm not good at this so why do it? Or, it's the wrong time in my life. 
   In my humble experience, the answer to the question, what if I get off track, is GET BACK ON! If coming back to a habit, or project, or goal is good for you and makes life better than just start again with a clean slate. Brush yourself off and get back onto the saddle. Happy Trails and lets circle round and start again.

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My novel Rubato

Click here to read the book for free for a limited time.

Umkehr Another Word For Turn

FOMO-Fear Of Missing Out

I have been suffering from FOMO lately. You probably know what that feels like. It is that odd nagging feeling that everybody around you is engaged in their life but you can't figure out how to get on board of your own. It occurred to me that I've been here before. I worked on this very issue and back then I came up with six habits of happiness that made my life feel connected and sure.

      I go to the water on a regular basis to watch the sunrise. The light coming out of darkness everyday is very comforting to me. The return, or Umkehr, is symbolic for all the truths I've learned that get forgotten or put on the back burner. These truths rise up again and testify of their veracity on a regular basis. 
    Six Habits of Happiness-
       Pray Everyday
       Study Everyday
       Eat for Health Everyday
       Create Something Everyday
       Move Your Body (Exercise) Everyday
       Serve Someone Else Everyday

When I'm practicing my habits FOMO evaporates. My life goes back to feeling connected and sure. 

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On an island in the Pacific Northwest a piano teacher is found dead and a lost autograph manuscript of Franz Liszt is discovered. Who wanted that document enough to kill? 

Click here to read the book for free for a limited time.

Umkehr and Starting Fresh Everyday

"Getting a fresh start doesn't mean starting over--it could mean simply seeing the current project with new eyes, trying something different, or coming at the story from a different angle."

Shawn Smucker, author of The Day The Angels Fell

When doing something everyday there is a risk that the doing will become stale. If you are exercising the routine may become boring, if you are eating differently, the foods you made with gusto in week one may be suddenly too blah. Writing everyday certainly has that risk. I come to my book everyday knowing my weaknesses in the story and trying to look at them with new perspective. 

The quote above is by a writer who sends an e-mail out every weekday with motivating words from his own writing desk. He is currently writing a novel and his e-mails demonstrate the everyday struggle. I can relate to all his words. I find the promise of seeing anew very captivating. I can't control it, but I will be working on a paragraph which is not right and an idea will come which brings a new energy to my vision. Suddenly the words almost write themselves. I love that moment! 

I see on my chart that Thursdays are not working as writing days. That's fine. My day begins when I leave the house at 6 am and when I'm home from work it just doesn't happen. Seventeen out of twenty is just peachy and I feel satisfied. What are you trying to do everyday? Is it working? Could you look at it from a new perspective? 

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A piano teacher is found dead and a lost autograph manuscript of Franz Liszt is discovered. Who wanted that document enough to kill? 

Click here to read the book for free for a limited time.

Umkehr and Fighting Resistance

"The more Resistance you experience, the more important your unmanifested art/project/enterprise is to you-and the more gratification you will feel when you finally do it."

Have you read The War Of Art by Steven Pressfield? This little book encapsulates the opposition we might feel to doing something everyday for a month. Pressfield makes a through case for all the normal and odd resistance we can encounter for getting our work done. From procrastination to embracing drama to avoid doing our work, we as mortals seem to have an undoer on our tail all the time. I think of resistance as sticky sludge. Each day I wade through this strange entity and it never gets easier. Once my everyday goal of writing has commenced, in earnest, I love it and I feel in sync with my true desires. 

What does Pressfield say about overcoming resistance? Nothing that we haven't heard before. See yourself as a professional in what you are trying to do, be patient, recognize your limitations, seek help, show up everyday, self-evaluate, don't take your failure personally, and one that it hard for me, dedicate yourself to mastering technique. I have this crazy notion that if something doesn't come easily then you might not have talent. A lie. Keep coming back with new tools. To come back, that is the key. 

UMKEHR

"Most of us have two lives. The life we live, and the unlived life within us. Between the two stands resistance."

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A piano teacher is found dead and a lost autograph manuscript of Franz Liszt is discovered. Who wanted that document enough to kill? 

Click here to read the book for free.

Umkehr or Return to Writing Everyday

       Write, Delete, Write, Edit, Write Everyday

    In November when I had the audacity to try to write a mystery novel, I wrote everyday because I was trying to do it in by November 30th. It took until January 2018. Then I passed it around to people I love and they said it was worth publishing. I started a writing class in February and passed it around there. They said publish it, but edit, edit, edit. 

It is lucky my 2018 word is Umkehr. A German word meaning to come back, return, and repent.

I am not repenting of writing the book but I am returning to the text over and over again. I am so appreciative of the writers I love because I now fully understand the work they do. 

   One thing I've learned from the editing process is that changing a sentence can open another pathway, unforeseen before. Sometimes I feel so stuck and then I think of a piece of dialog which shows me another idea and off I go, again.

UMKEHR

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And, I thank-you for reading my mystery novel, Rubato. Judith, a piano teacher extraordinaire, makes a decision which, upon reflection, changes the lives of others and ends her own life. Detectives Stevie Dangerfield and Reggie Watts investigate her death and find musical intrigue that started in Eastern Europe.

Click here to read the book for free for a limited time.