Honoring The Melancholy

                                                                                             Melancholy

   It’s part of the increased darkness 

As days grow ever more short.

  Hibernating with inwardness

Even nature does a downward transport.

 I draw in, too, turning on the lights,

Finding more moments to read, 

  More candles to ignite

And eating more sugar with greed.

I fight the downward spiral

   Not willing to embrace the inner darkness

Where it can unwittingly go viral,

  I seek less gloom, more intimate stillness.

 I am eating my oatmeal with apples and nuts. The bowl is warm and fragrant. I’m breaking my own rules and eating on the couch with a blanket over my legs. My heart has an ache for a friend. She and her husband are homeless and living in their Suburban. How did this happen?

 Where will they turn to recover what they’ve lost?

   Another ache niggles up to the surface. Cancer treatment has robbed my friend of his vitality, never mind his hair. He is a man of great faith. When will he recover his health?

It’s Christmas time and these aches seem to be taking up residence right alongside the anticipated joy. It seems that this is always the case. 

                                            Joy and sorrow coexist in an uncomfortable pairing. 

    Winter is a season of extremes. The longest nights, coldest days, and most often sniffles and sneezes are an everyday occurrence. Why does Christmas come at such an unbalanced time?

                                    What is to be learned about balancing the dark and light?

  When heaviness enters my soul it isn’t lightness I long for and seek after. It isn’t distractions with silver bows and tinsel that I need. No Hallmark Christmas movie will remove my lack of ease. I yearn for a balance of reality and hope. Just like the night darkness is real, I want the hope a candle brings to the heart. Just like coldness seeps into my bones I desire the hope that a fire ignites as I push my toes to the flame. 

   Already I anticipate the balance of Spring again, when the days and nights are equal, when the growing and changing is measured and steady. 

                                   But, here I am in winter and Christmas is coming very soon. 

                                                                                

                                          Click here to go back to the Calm Christmas main page